I read a quote today, and immediately in my mind I thought, Fuck Yeah.

 “You never need to apologize for how you chose to survive.”

If this isn’t one of the most honest and real things I’ve ever read in my life, I don’t know what is.

You couldn’t imagine the things I’ve had to do to get myself through the 24th hour in the day. Or the incessant pep talks I’ve had to have within myself. To keep going. Pushing. Fight to live another day, etc.

So it’s infuriating to me when someone who has never come anywhere close to the excruciating pain that is found in burying your own child, has the nerve to give you what they believe are helpful suggestions about life. More specifically, your life.

How on God’s living earth would you have any idea of what is going to be helpful?

Please, enlighten me.

Tell me again why you think I (or any other parent in my position) should believe that everything happens for a reason. Or why the drinking of an entire bottle of wine by myself should be taken in stride?

What in all the actual fucks is a stride, when you’re in my position?

This is a serious question for me. Please, you literal ass hat you, help me answer this.

Oh wait, you can’t.

So please, stop trying. Stop doing. Stop thinking you know what’s best for someone when you have no idea what is actually working for them.

You couldn’t imagine what works for me. What has worked for me. And you don’t need to. Because it’s for me. Not you.

It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change. – Charles Darwin

2015 has changed me. It’s altered me. Both good and bad. I cannot change that. But please understand, that I will always respond in a way that will return my dividends tenfold.

And I’ve found more strength during my weakest moments than you could ever imagine.